A New Member to the Family and Holiday Gatherings

From the weekend before, My daughter Shelley sent me a message that when I had called her to pick up some items at my home,  I asked her to set the alarm which I had forgotten to do before I went to Three Rivers to celebrate Marc's birthday.  She found I left the front door unlocked. She said "you were really discombobulated!"

On a rainy Tuesday morning, the first day of winter, I woke up to messages that my granddaughter Crystal was in the hospital in labor. She was at 3 cm. The excitement level in the family was high.  She finally delivered close to 8:30 in the evening. She was admitted to the hospital at 1:30 AM.  I waited until the next morning to call and come out to see her and Nylah. What a beautiful baby girl. She has lots of hair.  Jennifer, Crystal's mom was sound asleep and didn't wake until I was leaving.  Lorence, Nylah's father came before I left. For all Crystal had been through, she looked great!

Nylah already shows character!

The hospital provided a fancier cap than I have seen!

Great-Grandmother Rachel with Nylah

Showing off Nylah

Isn't she cute?

Crystal, my granddaughter after a long labor

Jennifer, Nylah's grandmother, out for the count!

So Cute!

Crystal holding her daughter Nylah in the hospital

Aunt Heather holding her niece Nylah

Crystal looking gorgeous holding Nylah

Lorence holding his daughter Nylah

I went to a potluck at my teacher Carol's home in the mountains. I was so worried going because it rained for several hours in Bakersfield the day before that I was concerned about rocks and boulders coming down to the road driving up the canyon. It was chilly and overcast in Bakersfield giving the impression that snow might fall. Amazing, the drive in the canyon was non-eventful. When I got up to the two lanes each way, the sky continued to clear.  There were few clouds at the top. It was 45 degrees and sunshine.  On Tuesday morning the day after returning, they closed the canyon road due to rock slides. I was very fortunate! 

I met Carol's friends who live in the same area- Sue, Rita and Rita's daughter Stephanie in a tucked away area up a dirt road.  I enjoyed all of them. Each of us brought something for the buffet. Carol makes great soups and everyone else supplements the meal. I brought a salad.  Carol had Christmas music playing in the background. Carol's dog is named Sofie. Rita brought Buster and Sue brought Gabby. The dogs seem to be aware when it is potluck night each week and look forward to seeing each other. They trade off hosting the potluck in their homes.

Her guest room and bed were very comfortable. Carol was a wonderful hostess.  Now she needs to focus on herself for knee surgery and recovery. I'll contact her to find out her progress.  She has become a friend through our contact. 

The next morning I couldn't find my phone. I drove back up the hill from the main road because I was going to listen to a book I had already been following- Seveneves, by Neal Stephenson,  a very interesting science fiction book. I couldn't find it at Carol's home. So it had to be in my car.  Carol also told me the Vons in Lake Isabella had a Starbucks in the store where I stopped to get a coffee. I had oatmeal and hot chocolate at Carol's home before leaving. When I got home, I called my cell phone which was on vibrate and found it was in my car having slid under the front passenger seat.

No art classes with Carol until mid-March.  I will be visiting friends out of the area, so I decided not to sign up for a class during this period.  I will focus on pictures I have done that need more work.  This is another version of the horse.  I think it is improving.

It is improving, though I want to try a portrait
and another horse that is dark.

Christmas at Shelley's home was so nice.  She made a lovely dinner. We had Shelley's and Jennifer's families. Our newcomer Nylah Marie Garcia, now 3 days old was there. Crystal was sore and not quite ready to do so much, but you couldn't tell looking at her. Shelley's husband and I talked a lot.  Alyssa's boyfriend Issac was there and took the group shot of us. Wes, Heather's boyfriend was there and so was Lorence, Crystal's boyfriend and Nylah Marie's father.   What a lovely time we had!

Nylah the newcomer of the family

Kayla, Alyssa, Shelley, and Issac

Lorene and Crystal

Jennifer, Grandma is holding Nylah, Devin and Kevin

Devin, Kevin and Michael.  Shelley, wayyyy is the back

Michael, Kevin and Shelley

Devin holding Nylah, Kevin and Shelley photobombing them.

Wes and Heather

Shelley, Great Aunt holding Nylah

Kaylah, Shelley and Nylah

Kayla, Shelley and Nylah

Heather and Alyssa with their mom Shelley trying out the iPhone extender

Front row- Alyssa, Kayla and Jennifer
Back row- Kevin, Michael, Shelley, Devin, Heather, Wes and Me

I am heading to visit high school friends. It has been over 48 years since we graduated and that long since I have seen Linda and Toni. I saw Barb a while longer after high school. I have good memories of them.  This was what we looked like for pictures in our high school senior album in 1967.   Our high school class is going to have a 50 year reunion in 2017.  I hope I can go.  But, as we get older, it doesn't always work out the way we want it to.

Linda, Toni and Barbara are at the top
I am at the bottom
These are our pictures from our Senior Year Album  1967

Here is such a sweet picture of Billy with his sons Kason and Carson.  Billy's birthday, age 25 was Christmas day.  I saw him the day after Christmas and gave him what I had for him and his family.

Billy with, my Great-Grandsons Kason and Conner

And two more of this family:

Conner and Kason are the front boys
Gavin, Leigh, Coco and Alyssa

Kason looks so happy!

They got a trampoline!  How neat is that?!

It was a very nice week and as long as I rest in-between each event, I do okay.  The shot of cortisone I had in my hip has really helped!

This wood plaque is being sold on The Grief Toolbox for about $15.00. I believe recognition of these feelings we survivors feel help in coping with grief.     thegrieftoolbox.com

David Kessler founder of  grief.com  has much to share with us who are grieving.  He worked with Elisabeth Kubler-Ross, M.D.  Go to his site.  He has also written many books on grief and bereavement.  He wrote this below.

What is Grief?
Grief is the internal part of loss, how we feel. The internal work of grief is a process, a journey. It does not end on a certain day or date. It is as individual as each of us. Grief is real because loss is real. Each grief has its own imprint, as distinctive and as unique as the person we lost. The pain of loss is so intense, so heartbreaking, because in loving we deeply connect with another human being, and grief is the reflection of the connection that has been lost.

When does Grief end?
Grief is not just a series of events, or stages or timelines. Our Society places enormous pressure on us to get over loss, to get through the grief. But how long do you grieve for a husband of fifty years? A teenager killed in a car accident? A four-year-old child? A year? Five years? Forever? The loss happens in time, in fact in a moment, but its aftermath lasts a lifetime.

"You will not 'get over' the loss of a loved one; you will learn to live with it.  You will heal and you will rebuild yourself around the loss you have suffered.  You will be whole again but you will never be the same.  Nor should you be the same, nor would you want to."    

I hope your holidays went well and you took care of yourself, whatever that would be. It was a good week for me and I wish you the same.  See you next Sunday.  My husband Paul and I worked at Bakersfield Memorial Hospital.  He was a Vice-President and Chief Financial Officer.  I was the Director of Social Services.  It is interesting how we stay connected to this hospital for so long with Crystal, my granddaughter having her daughter, Nylah Marie and Meagan my granddaughter-in-law also having her son Kason here.                   Rachel

Being Discombobulated Did Not Ruin the Week!

Barbara and I went to Urricchios for dinner and then the George Kahn Jazz and Blues Revue put on by the Bakersfield Community Concert Association.  It was great!  Janet was going to go but didn't feel well. It was so chilly I thought it would snow.  Other people were thinking that too. We rarely get snow, but it does happen. 

I had my art class with Carol.  Wayne was there and another woman Rolene  who has hung her art in the gallery. She wanted to work on drawing a lion. Wayne has done a beautiful portrait of a young girl - top notch!  I worked on my lion and will frame it soon. My horse is not there yet, but it is improving.  Jolene said the problem with the last picture of my horse was that the front legs were not below the withers.  "What's a wither?.  She pointed to a slight bum below the neck.  It is good to have others in the class, because you get more feedback.  Having Carol to myself helped me with the personal attention I needed then.  Now Carol will be off having surgery and recovering, so no class until sometime in mid-March.  I have plans to visit people out of the area during that time so I didn't sign up for any other art classes.  I will work on what I have been doing.

My lion is finished.  I like him!

I have drawn my horse four times.  It gets better each time.
This was done on tracing paper because I transferred the
part that was okay and changed some other parts.  I got
carried away adding detail.  I will do it on good paper.
Still needs work on it.

My friend Victor came to go over what he  had written. I felt it all hung together much better. We met at a new Sushi restaurant called Jin Sushi. I got sushi, a seaweed salad and saki. Very fresh and tasty. Vic had the Bibimbap and loved it.  He got there early having car problems and walked around.  He found some restaurants close by to try in the future. We went into a couple of antique stores. One had a lot of Red Hats. They were inexpensive so I bought a couple. 

I became discombobulated on Friday. I got together with friends I used to work with in a cabin we rented for one night in Three Rivers. So getting ready to go, I was handling a lot of issues. Since I've had a mastectomy, I use a silicone breast  prosthesis I put in my bra to make me even. When I took off to join my friends two hours away, I realized I left my purse at home.  I had put some Tylenol PM in my purse because I don't sleep well without it. I had no money to stop and buy more. I had my iPhone because I was listening to a book. I got there at 3 pm, but the first to show up after me was Annemarie at 4:10.  Soon after Lynette and her husband Simon showed up. My cell phone had poor reception, but the did get my message that I was there, I forgot my purse and I needed Tylenol. They sent me several messages, but I didn't get them. When we got inside the cabin, the temperature was 48 degrees F.  They had a phone in the cabin and a router.  I was able to get good WiFi reception. We called out other friend Marc to let him know we were there. He lives in Three Rivers and we were celebrating his 70th birthday. He had Benadryl which works well for sleep. Simon made a wonderful stew we had on a smashed baked potato, with a Kale salad and butternut squash.  So now the cabin is toasty warm, so I remove my sweatshirt. As I'm walking around I have this sense that something was wrong. Well, I put the silicone breast prosthesis on the wrong breast looking incredibly lopsided!  We played scrabble, drank wine and nibbled water crackers with goat cheese with red grapes and strawberries on the side.

Marc and Lynette playing Scrabble with a board
for those of us with very bad vision.  We are in
the cabin we rented for the night. 

Lynette and Simon

I have no idea why I didn't take a picture of Annemarie on
this trip!  But, she did give me this gorgeous pottery piece
she made.  I don't feel that deserving, but I love it.  She
wants a copy of the picture of my lion, so I will send her that.

 They also picked up a chocolate, chocolate cake with raspberry jam to wish him a happy birthday.  We gave him a picture we took this last summer of us girls who worked with him.   I left after breakfast (a wonderful frittata made by Annemarie) the next morning. The sky was getting very dark, indicating a significant weather change and I was going out to dinner with Janet and Barbara and then a concert. 

Our present for Marc.  We worked as a team with him.
Annemarie framed it.
Annemarie, Me and Lynette

My granddaughter-in-law, Meagan posted this picture of Conner and Kason.  I really can't tell them apart in a picture like this except for she said Conner fell asleep immediately, so that helps in identification.

Conner and Kason

I found my purse in my study. It started raining within a half-hour of returning home. I worked some on my blog but also took a nap. Barbara picked me up and we met Janet at Bill Lee's, a popular Chinese restaurant in town. Janet gave us our tickets for the Bakersfield Symphony Orchestra and the Bakersfield College Choir. What an excellent show!  Very professional playing by the orchestra and the choir was very good.  By the time we got to the auditorium, I had lost my ticket!  The three of us looked through my purse, pockets and around my seat. It was nowhere to be found!  After explaining to the ticket taker what happened, they let me in. The conductor Stilian Kirov is from Bulgaria. He was young and full of energy. The audience connected to him, giving several standing ovations. It seemed that the orchestra was very responsive to his directing giving a wonderful performance. The program was Home for the Holidays, a nice mix of Christmas Music. Hannah, Janet's granddaughter was in the Bakersfield Choir.   I feel proud of what Bakersfield is producing in the Arts!  There was a time, I was not impressed.  They have come a long way!

The Bakersfield Symphony Orchestra and The
Bakersfield College Choir in the
Harvey Auditorium at
Bakersfield High School.

I'm heading up to the mountains to a potluck at my teacher's home in Kernville.  I will go while it is daylight with the plan to come back tomorrow morning if the weather is okay.  Carol told me to dress comfortably and warm.  Good!  That is what I would have done.  I'm bringing the fixings for my green salad which goes over well wherever I take it.

That is it for the week.  I haven't started wrapping anything for Christmas, so that is what I will be working on when I get home.  I had been worried about doing too many things this weekend, but I had a break in between each event and that really makes the difference.

I hope you had a good week and I will see you next Sunday.                    Rachel

Holiday Lights, Potlucks and a Christmas Puppet Show

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I went with my friend Barb to an Audubon potluck and auction.   They did a nice puppet show. 

There were nine puppets with two women controlling them.
They presented different holiday situations told in poetry.
Lovely!

It occurred to me we are the generation of casseroles.   I make a salad of some kind to break up the starchiness of the casseroles.  I brought a green salad and it was almost all eaten.  What variety of food.  In the silent auction there was a used electric Yamaha organ. I bid on it and got it. I used to play the piano, so this is exciting. Then they had a auction caller. Barb and I checked out what they had and we were interested a tour of Tejon Ranch Conservancy. Including us, we can have 6 people. I picked my daughter Shelley and friend Janet. By Barbara and I splitting the cost of this, we were able to go higher and win the bid. Now Barb needs to pick two people. We want to wait until the weather is milder. We will pack a gourmet lunch and wine. 

This is the Yamaha I got sitting on my dining room table.

If you are interested in what we will see when we do the tour of the Tejon Ranch Conservancy, go here.  There are pictures, a blog, a write up on what they want to accomplish. and other information.

Tejon Ranch Conservancy

Wayne came back to art class!  Yeah!  I enjoyed him and he is very talented so that is good. Linda was also there, so we actually had a "class". We started on lions and next week is our last class until sometime in March.  Carol will have surgery, then have rehabilitation. My plan is to work on transferring  drawings from tracing to  drawing paper by measuring and blocking it.  I've never fully understood this, but in class, we used this technique in drawing lions.  We have done this before, but I think I'm just beginning to get this.  Linda picked up on the problem with my deer.  I thought it was the bent back leg, but she felt I needed to put a little angle on the front back leg.  That solved the problem.  I showed them my horse, but I was embarrassed by it.  They felt just a little work would do it.  So, I re-did it.  It looks better, but something is still off.  While Carol is off, I'm going to work on the pictures that I have.  And finally, I did a lion.  Though, it may be a little off, I like him.  He is sitting on his haunches, somewhat to the side.  I can't seem to show all the skin that is wrinkled, but I got the idea.  Also, he had a lot of hair, not just in front, but underneath and to the sides of his belly.  I never noticed that before.

My deer continues to improve!

She is improving, no longer a cartoon, but she is still off on
proportion.  I think it is the legs mostly.

I like him!  He has character!

Janet and I went to the Holiday Lights at the California Living Museum (CALM).  We really enjoyed it!  It wasn't quite as cold as last year. I bought these Hot packs to attach to my socks at my toes and to also place in my pockets.  The Christmas lights were timed with the Christmas music.   It was all so lovely. After, we went to The Red Pepper to top the evening off. 

Janet at The Holiday Lights at CALM

Me at The Holiday Lights at Calm

So here is another picture of Conner and Kason.  They are a year apart, and they look like twins to me!

My great grandsons Conner and Kason

My granddaughter Crystal is ready to deliver Nylah Marie this month.  She is more than ready.  She feels fat and ugly, though none of us feel she is.  She is just a beautiful young pregnant woman.  She is running out of clothes to wear and feels very unattractive.  I have heard this from others, so I think this is common.  She and Lorence got an apartment.  She came to borrow money to get cleaning supplies, but I had a lot here and gave it to her.  I think things will be so much better after Nylah arrives.

I did see my primary Doctor, Doctor Quiogue. She had breast cancer and chemo and recently returned.  She used to have long straight hair. Now it is short and curly. She looks lovely the way it is, but my friends whose hair did this eventually returned to how it looks before chemo. She said she will leave it short because there is little to do when leaving the house. It saves a lot of time. So I told her my right hip joint was really hurting for about six weeks. She felt it and told me I had bursitis. She gave me a cortisone injection in that point and now it feels a lot better. She gave me instructions on exercises which will help with this. She also had me get lab work done. I'm so glad I saw her.

Here is an excellent description of grieving. This is how it has been for me. 

http://www.thatericalper.com/2015/08/16/person-is-asking-for-advice-hn-how-to-deal-with-grief-this-reply-is-incredible/

So, I liked the week.  It was not completely filled, which is the way I need it.  I have events scheduled this next week that I am looking forward to.  I really hope your week went well and I will see you next Sunday.    Rachel

I'm Going to Control Myself to Not Overdo the Holidays

My teacher Carol had a minor suggestion for my deer picture. My contour drawing of a horse needs more work, but she was impressed.  I told her it looked a little off to me. She said when I felt that way, check my measurements. That was fascinating.  They were such small changes that made a big difference. Then we worked on drawing horse tails and manes. I watched how she did it and I was awed at how well it came together. 

I've been getting rid of strong lines

Ugh!  Still not right and I feel her eyes look like a puppet!
And, her body is still off!

I'm going to try another picture I have, like a portrait and
I swear, the horse looks like she is flirting!  So cute!

My friend Janet and I joined my neighbor Celeste for dinner at the Renegade Room at Bakersfield College. This is a junior college that has a program in Culinary Arts.  You can earn an AA degree and transfer to get a BA degree. They also offer a certification for their program. Celeste's son who is looking at a second career is in this program.  He hopes to do catering which he had done before this program.  Celeste had shared the menu for this last term.  They do two nights and one lunch for the weeks school is going. This was the last week and they will start late February.  When I asked why so late when school starts in January and I was told, "Well they have to learn some things before cooking."  My friends had shrimp scampi and I had chicken. Janet and I would like our dishes with more flavor. Janet felt there was not enough garlic.  I thought I was getting chicken piccata. But, no, it had a coating, but too bland for my taste. I had clam chowder which was wonderful. The salad was unique with puff pastry and a very interesting dressing. Dessert was Tiramisu or Butternut Squash with Maple Syrup and Vanilla Ice Cream. I had the Butternut Squash. It was tasty. So, even if you are thinking it is a vegetable, it was sweet and met the need for my sweet tooth.  Dinner was less than $20 each. They don't serve alcohol, so Janet and I had a glass of wine before going. Tips are shared with all the students working and you must make reservations early. 

  

Shelley and I went to the Red Hat dinner at the Mark. At this dinner we have an exchange of a Christmas ornament or something for the holidays.  I got Shelley a pink hat since she has 3 years to go before wearing the red hat. Though, I don't think any in our group would mind if she wore a red hat. So now she has a red and a pink hat. 

Marti and Jo

Claudia, Me and Shelley

Evelyn, our leader and Pamela

Shelley and Me

We had a gift exchange

Barbara brought me homemade vegan chocolate fudge with walnuts, homemade bread and three avocados from her tree. I have no restraint. I ate the fudge as soon as she left. The following day, I had the bread with butter.  Delish! 

So that is it for the week.  I did schedule to see my primary doctor next Friday about my hip.  It is still bothering me.  My granddaughter Crystal said "Why do you wait so long Gramma?"  I told her I didn't want to keep complaining, though I think I already do that a lot.

So I have something going almost every day this next week, most okay.   Oh, I said I was going to control myself to not overdo the holidays!  Oh well, I did some this week.  I hope your week went well and I will see you next Sunday.               Rachel