Slower Week

This week has been a little slower for me, but I have to do that periodically to recharge.  One thing that I use as an excuse about not getting my home cleaned and straightened is that I have too much to do.  Perhaps, but I've been using that excuse this week and I can't keep going like that.  My step-mom Kate came on Friday and that is a real incentive to clean up,  Actually, every time I have something at my home, I do cleaning and straightening.  It's really good I'm not a complete hermit.  My patio is looking and sounding good.  It is my sacred space and where Kate and I spent the afternoon on Friday.  We had salads that I picked up from Trader Joe's and Kate brought fruit tarts.  There was the scent of the blossoms of citrus trees in the air.  My fountain and chimes were going, plus I had forest sounds, mostly birds coming out of a small speaker I hid.  This has taken a while to get it where it is, but I'll probably adjust things more to make it balanced.  Kate brought some beautiful Daffodils which we set up on the patio where we were.  We brought the table from the kitchen out for us each to work on our art work.

My Patio - fountain, chimes, heater for cool days and nights, soundscape of birds and other forest animals

I also met with my daughter Shelley.  I so enjoy spending time with her.  We went out for brunch and talked about family things, art and taking care of ourselves.  We will do Easter at my home because I think it would be pleasant on the patio even if it is cool because I have a heater which will knock off the chill.  I don't believe it will be too warm.  It is still early.  Shelley, Alyssa and I are going to do a weekend trip to Sacramento in the near future leaving early Friday and home by late Sunday.  No specifics yet, but she grew up there and needs to see where she lived, besides I like the area.  I'm sure there are other things we can do.

My granddaughter Kayla had asked if we would go to Jeff (my son)  and Stephanie's home around Easter. They are not sure they will be in town and their girls won't be coming back from college. The kids would really love to see the girls, so we will have to make another arrangement to see them.  Kayla and I went for a drive up Breckenridge Road.  I've always wanted to do it.  I had a writing class in the afternoon, but I completely lost all sense of time as we drove up that road.  It was all paved, though not always in great shape. It was beautiful and the air smelled great.  We came out south of Bodfish a small mountain town and stopped in Kernville for a late lunch before getting home.  We left in the morning and we got back about 4:30 pm.

I had my last class with Nina Landgraff at Bakersfield College.  She will be offering another class in the fall.  If it is the same time, I can do it.  Otherwise I won't be able to because my class with Carol Bradshaw at The Bakersfield Art Association is going to be from 1 to 4 pm.  Nina's course was 5 weeks long and we covered a lot of territory in that time.  The last class was drawing animals.  So I drew a lamb.  Very poor job, it has almost a human head.  I have the eyes forward and it's eyes are on the side of the head.
Then a drew an oryx and that one worked.

I received a couple 

I received a short video and an article which I felt reminded me of issues I dealt with when my parents and then when my husband died. I think saying the things you would like to say while they are alive is a lot better than fretting that you didn't after they died.  We don't do all the right things.  We are human and that is just what we do.  Our relationships with people also affect how much we are willing to share, but I feel so much better telling my dad that I could not have had a better dad.  He was there for me, he offered guidance and support and he was very gentle.  I was fortunate to have him.  My relationship with my mother was very strained and is another story, but I tried to the end to get her to see that I did love her and I wanted her to love me. But I did the most I could do, so I don't have guilt around what happened.  I really didn't want to believe my husband was dying and seemed to play down issues more than I wish I had.  It wouldn't have changed what I did, but maybe I would have been even closer to him at the end.  One thing though, it doesn't matter if you are real close or not.  It still hurts unless you have closed yourself off to feelings.

Here a son, Jason Rodas shares with his mother what she has meant to him.
http://m.wimp.com/finalmoments/


This is the article with what to consider when your loved one is dying, by Noah Michelson, published in the
Huffington Post
http://m.huffpost.com/us/entry/4936843?ncid=fcbklnkushpmg00000063

Thank you for reading these, and I hope you will share what you want to hear and what are your concerns.  I'll see you next Sunday at 9:00 pm.    Rachel