Thanksgiving Time, My Favorite Holiday

At class with Carol, she felt my pictures of Barbara's dog Patti and the picture of my cat Pepper were ready for framing. I spoke with Toni, who does framing at the Bakersfield Art Center about what I wanted. It will have a white matte with a thin line of black next to the picture. The frame will be in a simple black. She said they would be ready for Christmas. It will run about $40 per picture.   I think that is reasonable.  Carol thought the deer I did was pretty good. She felt it looked more relaxed than most of my pictures. I would agree with her. She had some suggestions for improving my picture which I will incorporate in my work. We are starting on a horse. She has encouraged me and other students to consider the skeleton which makes a big difference in getting the right form and mass.  So that is the first thing we worked on. It helps a lot. 

My deer again

First Attempt at Contour Drawing of Horse

Thanksgiving went well.  There were 12 of us, including my son Jerry.   I hadn't seen him for over a year.   My granddaughter Kayla helped me getting last things straightened and getting the food on.  I planned the meat to cook at 15 minutes per pound. Since last year the turkey was dry,  Shelley thought we should check it a half hour earlier than that and it was done. It had a button which had popped.  Moist and delicious. The dishes were all tasty and Shelley made stuffed mushrooms and a delicious pumpkin cheese cake!  Devin made a cranberry relish we made last year. It was changed a little but was delicious!  We put it over cream cheese and had different crackers to put it on.   I told Devin he should call this his signature dish and offer to make it for gatherings.  It is good and easy to make.   Everybody was relaxed and it was a very pleasant gathering.

Granddaughter Kayla, Daughter Shelley, Daughter Jennifer,
and Granddaughter Crystal

Crystal and Lorence

Shelley and  her daughter Alyssa

Crystal and  and her Aunt Shelley

Shelley with two of her children Heather and Kevin 

Kevin with his mom Shelley

Shelley and Jennifer did the dishes that evening. The next morning I went from one task after another. When I got to the refrigerator, I saw it was time to change the water filter. So I turned it to remove it, and water squirted everywhere!  I ran to get towels and couldn't screw the filter back in. Ugh. I called Shelley and told her what was happening. I turned the water off to the house.  So we went to get another filter. I had misplaced my wallet so we used Shelley's card. Shelley was able to get the new filter on. She got my house cleaned up. We went to get money so I could pay her and the ATM machine would not let me take out what I requested even though there was enough money. I requested less and then it gave me the money.   I couldn't check my savings account though it had been linked. So now I'll have to go to the bank and find out was going on. 

Janet and I went to Mexicali's.  We exchanged Thanksgiving stories. Ha! What a fine talk!  Both of our stories would work well for a standup comedian.  We were both laughing so much. And then this woman a generation older than us said she thought it was neat to see mother (me) and daughter (Janet) out together. Janet said we were very good friends. I told her I was the younger one by three years.  I think she was embarrassed, but we got a kick out of it!

Here are recent pictures of my great grandsons Conner and Kason.  I think they look so much alike, except Conner is bigger than Kason.

Conner

Kason

This woman who calls herself One Fit Widow shared a blog written by Family Lives On Foundation. They are a nonprofit organization that depends on donations.  This is to all kids who have lost a parent. It is very good!  If it doesn't fit you, share it with someone who might benefit.  

https://www.facebook.com/OneFitWidow/posts/669353633206906

So that is it for my week.  I have a couple of nice events this next week.  I didn't contact the doctor yet about my hip.  I'll call for an appointment tomorrow.  It continues to hurt.  Two of my friends suggest it might be bursitis.  Ugh!  It is amazing how much happens when you get older.  Despite the medical issues, I love the other parts of my life.  It makes it worth going on.  By the way, my brother and cousin said they were not interested in what I eat.  I don't blame them, but local people might want to try the restaurants I have gone to.  Believe me, many wouldn't try them because they sound too different.  When I finally get them there, they are pleased.  So sorry about the food reviews, just breeze over those parts.  I appreciate you reading.  I hope your week went well and your next week is as good or better.  Talk to you next Sunday.             Rachel

Eating and Drawing, Ways to Cope When It Seems So Much is Going On!

Monday night Barbara, Janet and I went to a concert sponsored by the Bakersfield Community Concert Association.  The group was Hits and Grins. They were country western wrote and sang their own songs.  They have written many songs for other musicians that were number one on the charts. They sang well and also played their instruments well.   It was a real pleasure!

Hits and Grins

Excellent Song Writers

Excellent Performers

At my class with Carol, she gave good feedback on my drawings so I'll be working on that this week.  I had the eyes of my cat Pepper different sizes and the pupils off.  I am working on the detail of a deer this week.  

I keep refining Barbara's Dog Patti                                  

My kitty Pepper- Still needs more work on the eyes

Drawing of a Deer.  How do you get the mass and the hair correct?

I went to Martha's home and then we went to the Helping One Woman group in Woodlake which is much closer to Martha's home. I appreciated that it didn't go as long as the one in Visalia. The woman honored this week was Jackie Rojas who is under doctor's care for Hepatitis C and Cirrhosis of the Liver which required a liver transplant in September. The dinner  was held at  the Woodlake Lion's Club.    The food was catered by Charros Mexican Restaurant. It was not Mexican food, but like a great home cooked meal.    The building that was used is being torn down and expanded.  So I don't know where this will be held until this is done.  I sat with my friends Martha and Susan plus a new friend I made, Gloria. We enjoyed talking.   

Jackie Rojas and her husband

Me with my friends Martha, Gloria and Susan

The next morning Susan, Martha and I met for breakfast at the Whistle Stop Cafe in Exeter.   They have a cute electrical train set that runs around the upper wall and over the ceiling of the restaurant. They don't leave it on, so if you want to see it move, you'll have to ask them to turn it on.  The food is good with a great variety of omelettes and other breakfast dishes.

Whistle Stop Cafe with the Train Track and Train

I met with Vic at Tofu House. My feedback on the book he is writing was just in making it flow better. I had a hard time describing this, but he finally got what I was trying to say.   I had a lettuce roll this time and it was delicious, and,  I had enough leftover for anther meal. 

So on my regular get together with Janet at Mexicali's, I told her that my right hip was really hurting these days for the last couple of weeks specifically. I have no idea of an event that could have started this. I told her that I would call to see a doctor about this. She thought since I got shots in my back, they may be able to do the same with my hip. Maybe. I will check into this. We both seemed to have memory issues; she said she would call me when she remembered what she wanted to say.  She thought it was a good point.  For myself, as soon as I remembered I sent her an email. This really stretches out our conversations. Then I told her I was feeling really cold with the change in temperature and it is hard for me to warm up unless I get under the covers. She laughed and said she had the same problem. Then she said, "do you remember how we would go into older people's homes that felt like sweat boxes?"  and likened  it to how we were like them now!  Maybe that is why some family limit their stay  here. Ha ha!

On Saturday, Barbara and I went to see the final movie The Hunger Games, Mockingjay, Part ll.  It didn't follow the book in all areas. Barbara has a great memory and told me where it veered.  I thought the last movie was okay, but I think the first movie of the series was the best. Afterwards we went to an Italian restaurant we like which is close to home-  Rosas.   I had leftovers from my dish of fettuccini and clams in olive oil and garlic. Our waiter suggested serving it with eggs at breakfast. It sounded odd at first to me, but I did add it to scrambled eggs and it was delicious. 

It may not seem like I took breaks, but I slept a lot between events.  I have to build up my energy reserves. Then I do well. I certainly do not have the energy I used to have. It is interesting how I realize I can't do things the same way I used to.  Someone asked a question on Quora.com about coming to terms with getting older. I think you have to go through through it. Perhaps we keep trying to do it like we used to do it, but our bodies scream NOOOO!  Well, if you want to enjoy life you may have to find new ways to do what you were doing or something you.

People here have expressed fear with what the terrorists did in Paris, even though the terrorists have been doing this in other areas too.  I refuse to stop my travels because of terrorist threats. I refuse to live my life in fear, which is what the terrorists want from us. I think my life has been so much fuller, richer because of my travels and meeting people in other cultures.  I have found other people's lifestyles very interesting and as human beings, there is much we have in common.  I believe the United States already has good protections set up for us developed since September 11.  I don't agree with refusing refugees. There are very intricate measures already taken to limit the bad guys coming in. We also have our own homegrown terrorists which have been given a leg up with the support of the NRA.  Why wouldn't we focus on that which has had a major effect on people feeling safe in our country?  It seems very contradictory to me.  Remember that Jewish people were turned away and many of them ended up  dying in Concentration Camps. Remember the Japanese Americans who's properties and businesses were stolen and they were placed in concentration camps in the United States. Most of these people were citizens of the United States and were American patriots. We have done this to Mexicans and other peoples south of the border. We are all immigrants or born of immigrants except for the American Indians.   We did not do this to the Germans which would imply those who look different from us are not worthy of our respect.   It looks like some people need to have someone to look down upon.  This is a land of immigrants.  This makes out country so much more interesting. I would not like us all to be alike. We benefit from the varied cultures in our country. 

Well, that is it for the week.  I hope your week went well.  I will see you next Sunday.  I just noticed that this is my 100th post!      Rachel

How Do We Comfort Each Other?

Before getting into what I discuss in my blog, I want to express my condolences to all the people of France, the victims and their families. It seems we are living in a very dangerous time and there are people who are filled with such hate that they will kill innocents. This happens here also. I believe that love and peace will eventually win, but we need to stand against hate. We all want a safe place to live and be able to live our lives without threat.  Terrorism has no place in our world.  Many people have posted heartwarming tales of people helping people. The more we do this, the more it will multiply. It takes so little to be kind. And there is a big payoff with an attitude like this. I'm not being PollyAnnish. I don't see this as an unreasonable or unrealistic way of being. What we do reverberates out. Kindness in general begets kindness as hatred in general begets hatred.  I don't mean on an individual basis that it will always turn out good. But, when I look at us as a group, the whole, this can make a better environment for all of us. 

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On October 24, I shared an article about what we need when we are grieving. This article touched a nerve in quite a few people. We would like to be sensitive of others, but feel very overwhelmed in providing this support because we are hurting too or we would like to make it all better for the one suffering. Or being in denial, because what we are seeing and observing is more than we can psychologically accept.   Unfortunately, we can't always do this. When we feel so incapable of doing this, we feel we are worthless. My sense is that our American culture never helped us in dealing with this.  I believe that other cultures that have dealt with death and dying in a more open manner seem to do much better than us. 

One issue which I believe is tied to this is the fear of dying.  I will admit this was my fear.   In the beginning when I was diagnosed I preferred ignorance.  I did not want to know any details. I did not want to do research to find out what worked better; what were things that would help me more.  I wanted my portacath out when my treatment was done because I wanted to pretend I was normal, and since I felt this portacath and that it would have to be flushed regularly to keep it from clotting, I would not be able to pretend or a word that describes it well, be in denial. One nurse was upset at me for pushing to get the portacath removed saying "what if the cancer came back?"  I was so angry with her  I said "then the chemo didn't work!"  Well, in fact, the cancer did come back seven years later. After crying a lot, I decided I had to take a different approach.  So this time I decided to look directly at my fears. It is interesting what happens when you do this. It becomes a non issue. I had friends who thought this was very negative.  I lost my fears as I did this.   So since then, it isn't the fear that gets in my way, it is not feeling good which is difficult to tolerate. I like being active and when I don't feel well, I can't do this. If someone has a thought in dealing with this, I would appreciate!

I found this article about dealing with fear. It is worth taking the points it offers. 

http://www.dealingwithfear.org/fear-of-death.htm/

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AT&T came out Monday morning. I have had multiple issues with my service.    It turnout, I had several issues going on that one remote control, the receiver and one of the DVR's were replaced. He checked the speed and in the end, it appears it is all working.  

Shelley and I joined several of our Red Hatters to a paint night. Shelley and I have discussed doing this for a while. It was great!  It was at a wine bar called Wine Me Up!  They also had beer and appetizers.  The wine list was fairly extensive and because I'm not really a beer drinker, I didn't note the choices of beer.  We got there a little early to get set up,    get our wine and appetizers, which were unique and tasty.  There were seven of us from our group and we all did the same picture.  We all loved it and plan to go back in February or March. 

Members of our Red Hat group who went- Pamela, Claudia, Me,
Evelyn, Judie, Shelley, and newest member Betsy.  We
all painted the same picture.

Some of the people painting.

The leader of our group Evelyn and me

My daughter Shelley painting

No, it is not a dragon, it is red wine poured in a glass and
splashing out.  On the left if a vase with flowers.  I'll guess the
white and yellow are the son, but I don't know.
This is on my wall next to the Entry Way of my home.

Crystal came over for dinner one night to learn to make something different together  for her family. She is the cook. So we did something very easy - hamburger patty with grilled onions, beef gravy, mashed potatoes and string beans.  I wanted to do chili beans but I thought with her being pregnant, it might be a problem.   But, I gave her the supplies to make this for the family.  Next time, we will make a meatless meal. 

I got together with my friend Jeanne at the Tofu House. Delicious food! Breathe loved the food and I know she will go back. When people try it out, they love it.   I bought a tee shirt which turned out to be too small for me even though it said extra-large, which said Sassenach. Sassenach is an English Inhabitant in Scotland often used in a derogative manner, but not in this story. This is from the series Dragonfly in Amber by Diana Gabaldon.    The menu changed. Some of the prices raised which made sense since I thought they under charged for several items they served.   They also added some items including lettuce wraps. Yum!   I'll try that next time! 

My friend Jeanne wearing the tee shirt I gave her.

Janet and I met at Mexicali's, where we meet most weeks. This time, she showed me the picture I had drawn of her dog Poopy, now professionally framed. Wow!  That really made the picture stand out. I took the picture when it was dark in her car. It still came out fairly good!

Janet holding the picture of Poopy in her car.
She had just picked it up from the framers.

I saw my oncologist on Friday and had chemotherapy.  I had gone to the lab, but tests for this chemo were not listed. Oh well.  I will  do this next time I go to the lab.  My nurse gave me the direct number to m Doctor and them, so I can call immediately to correct this.   

I went to Visalia to join my friends, including Marc who's wife Mimi died. Annemarie and I shared a room at the Marriott where Lynn and her husband Simon were.  We ate at The Vintage Press, a very nice restaurant.  Two other people we worked with joined us, Dr. Fisher who for a while was our supervisor, and Dr. Thomas who worked on another unit.  It was a lovely evening and we will meet in December after Marc's birthday most likely at Tommie's a pleasant restaurant in Visalia.  I hope we can stay at The Marriott again.  It is a nice place.  I brought too much snack food, again as did Lynn and Annemarie.  We had water crackers, with goat cheese, red and green grapes, plus a Cabernet to have before heading to dinner.

 

So that is it for the week. It was a full week, but I was able to fit in a couple of needed naps.  I hope you week went well and I will see you next Sunday.  I will be working further on my contour drawing of a deer to bring to class on Tuesday.  Right now, I'm going to take a much needed nap.     Rachel

It Is Beginning to Cool Here!

My heater would not turn on Monday night. It was the first night I attempted to turn on the heat. The next morning I called to get it fixed. I could hear it attempting to run, but it would not light. I called the repair company and they came that evening   My fingers were really cold. I was fine when I was in bed. It was tough moving out from under the covers.  I realize that for those people in real cold weather, they would think it was a joke. But when it has been so much warmer, like low in the 80's, the 50's seem very chilly!    So when he came, he said the sensor wire was crimped and stuck in the metal cover, so it wasn't getting the message to light.  I was so glad there was no charge for fixing it because they did the last repair.  All I see is my money floating out the window. I get so anxious!

I showed Carol, my teacher, my art work. She feels I'm coming along quite well on my drawing. She had thoughts to improve each picture which wouldn't require too much. This week we started drawing deer. I printed pictures I thought would be good practice.  I worked on all the animal pictures I did. When I met with my friend Janet, I gave her the two pictures I did of her dog Poopy. She plans to have them framed. I look forward to seeing them on her wall. The picture I did of Barbara's dog Patti I will have framed because the size is not standard and I know what needs to be done to get it framed correctly. I am pleased with what I did with my cat Pepper. I'll pass by Carol, but I think it might be ready for framing.  No class this week, but I'm working on contour drawings of deer. 

My Cat Pepper

Contour Drawing of a Deer

It rained much of Monday and some on Tuesday. While in class, a news item came on my iPhone that two boulders the size of cars and another much bigger came down closing the mountain road to Lake Isabella.  There was also a mudslide. I wasn't thinking to offer my home if she got stuck here since she lives by Lake Isabella. I called a little later and left a message of my offer. She didn't get the message until she got home. She took an alternate route which adds quite a bit of time.  She will pack an emergency bag just in case she gets stuck and will stay at my home if this occurs. 

I ordered a used book through Amazon.com that Janet loaned me called The Watercolor Cat. Art by Peggy Chun and story by Shelly Mecum. Beautiful art!  This woman had ALS and switched hands when her right hand stopped working, then used her mouth when her hands stopped working. Then, when that stopped working, she used a computer program that followed her eye movement. So this used book I got, was signed by the artist (who lived in Hawaii) the writer and a paw print by her cat Boo. In addition to that, it says, "Aloha Rachel, By all means Paint". This was given to a woman's granddaughter Rachel as noted on the back of the book cover, but I was amazed by this.  I showed Janet this who thought it was beyond amazing. 

My daughter Shelley and I went to the Red Hat Dinner at PF Changs.  The food was delicious. The previous time we were there, it wasn't consistently good. I'm glad we gave it another try.   I always enjoy getting together with them and I'm glad Shelley goes. I'm trying to get my friend Janet to go. I'm sure she would like the our gatherings and the women in it. Shelley took a group shot and since she was not in the picture, we did a selfie outside. Since there were lights at ground level, I look odd because the cast shadow makes it look like I have cat eyes. 

Shelley and Me

Me with Evelyn, Jo, Vicki, Pamela and Marti
Shelley is taking the picture

My friend Barbara invited me to a Sierra Club meeting which was held in the hall of the St. George Greek Orthodox Church on Truxtun.  They had great food and a silent auction. After these, there was a presentation on how the San Joaquin Valley Air Pollution  Control District is failing in protecting the health of the citizens of this valley, and in particular, the southern part of our valley which includes Bakersfield, Arvin, Lamont, Shafter, Wasco  Delano, Taft and Buttonwillow. The oil companies have no useful standards that they are held to.  Particulate matter and ozone levels are so high that the average age at death is four years less than the rest of the United States and we have the most polluted air in all of the United States. At one time that was Los Angeles. But no longer. We are now the winner in that category.  The Kern County Board of Supervisors give the oil companies here a pass. It is better not to look than to find information and be forced in some way to deal with it.   They hold the people to do much higher standards than the industry which is here. We agree that we all need to play a role in this, but this must also include industry which does the bulk of polluting our valley.

Here are the most recent pictures of my great-grandsons Conner and Kason. They are handsome boys who are growing like Weeds!

Conner

Kason

My niece Kerri Buttler shared this with me. We all, including me, could learn something from this. I'm aware of it for my issues, but not always for other people. We all could benefit from a reminder on what is empathy.  

https://m.youtube.com/watch?sns=fb&v=1Evwgu369Jw

So that is it for the week. I continue to feel good. So, I will continue to do the things I want to do. I'm so fortunate. I hope you have a wonderful week. I'll see you next Sunday.      Rachel

Forest Falls

My niece Kerri Buttler shared this article "Everything Doesn't Happen for a Reason",  wanting my opinion. She's a very loving person.  For herself, she feels there must be a meaning for her suffering.  I don't  agree with this for all situations.  I was horrified with people who would say to me "it was meant to be", "you'll grow from this"," you must be stronger", etc.   I was offended by this.  I felt it was making light of my pain. I do understand some of why people say this besides actually believing this and/or they don't know what else to say. But, it meant so much more when someone was willing to just be with me. I know it is uncomfortable, but that is what I needed. I wouldn't want anyone to feel guilty because they weren't doing it right.  And, yes, I did grow in time from what happened to me. I don't think I was better that someone else that I did this. I think I just had the right type of support that allowed that to happen. It is a very heavy burden to put on someone that they were responsible for what happened.  In their own process of grieving, they may come to this if it makes sense to him or her. But, I do not want to hear from someone about what I should do, be or feel. I think it is presumptuous of others to do this.

Here is the article written by Tim Lawrence.  It is well written and thoughtful. 

http://www.timjlawrence.com/blog/2015/10/19/everything-doesnt-happen-for-a-reason

If you are interested in other articles Tim Lawrence has written or to know more about him, go here:  http://www.timjlawrence.com/blog/                                                 

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Last Sunday, my daughter Shelley and I went to my niece Shannon's and her husband Patrick's home in Forest Falls.  It was about a 3 1/2 hour drive.  Shannon's mom Kerri, also my niece, was visiting and I had not seen her for several years. It was wonderful seeing her and Shannon. Shannon was recovering from a punctured lung which happened when the chair she was in flipped backward. I think it was good that Kerri was here, though she was also very limited because of physical disabilities. They had one restaurant, Mexican, a favorite on the West Coast which was quite good and reasonably priced.  Shannon and Patrick's home has a beautiful view of the mountain and a waterfall from their backyard.  So here are a few pictures from that trip. I'm so pleased that Shannon's family is doing well.  I'm hoping that Kerri and her husband will consider moving back to California (from Washington).  There wouldn't be "years" between visits.  Kerri is exploring how they could move to Forest Falls too.

Shelley and Me

Kerri, Shannon, Kaleb and Shelley

Kerri, Shannon and Shelley- The Cousins

Kerri, Me and Shelley

Patrick, Shannon and Kerri
At the Local Mexican Restaurant

Shelley went on a walk the next morning and took some beautiful pictures.  She has really become a very good photographer!  The first picture is of the waterfall behind their home.  Somewhat dry, but it has run heavily when we had quite a bit of rain recently. 

There was no art class this week, but I did work on my friend Janet's dog Poopy. She doesn't want any white on his eye. My reason for the white was reflection, so I made it much less. And my cat Pepper needs the hair blended more. What you would see is all black except for above the lip and the triangle under her chin. The rest is light reflection, but it doesn't quite look like that.  So more work there too.

Poopy
Attempting to get the reflection in his eyes

Pepper
Worked on the shading more.

Poopy in another pose.
More reflection in his eyes.

I got together with my friend Janet at Mexicali's. While there, she invited me to a performance her granddaughter Hannah was in.  It was The Bakersfield College Choir and Chamber Singers, along with Centennial High Chamber Singers and the Marvin Ramey's Experience Dance Studio. The title of the performance was Haunted Melodies. Excellent singing with very complicated riffs in some of the songs. The staging, decorations and the scary voices were nice touches. There were so many people there that many were standing in the aisles to see when all the seats were taken. But the Fire Marshall came and made them leave. I think this is a new theater, but it is fairly small.  The price was right. It was a donation. They asked for $10 for general admission, and $5 for students, staff and seniors. Though there were some people with no money and they got in. That is how a donation works.  I had looked up events at Bakersfield College and this was not listed.  I want to be informed of events to decide if my friends and I would like to go.  I'm not sure where to look.  If anyone knows, please inform me.  I would appreciate it.

My neighbor Celeste gave me the menu for the Renegade Room at Bakersfield College. They have a cooking school and they prepare lunch one day a week and dinner two nights a week. She said the food was excellent and wanted me to go with her one time. The date she picked I could not do, but I found another day that worked. I called in reservations for three to include Janet. Celeste said most of the spots were taken, so hopefully what day I selected works. I could only leave a message, but if there is a problem, I assume they will call.   They have been here for years.  I can't say why I've never gone.  I really look forward to this.

I got a call from the Bakersfield Concert Association which is soliciting more membership and donations.  My friend Janet joined and I gave a donation.  I hope others consider joining.  It really would be a shame if this group folded.  They have brought wonderful concerts to us.  I actually feel that a lot more people would like this if they heard it.  If  you are interested in becoming a member which is eight concerts a year for $80, or, giving a donation, go here:

http://www.bakersfieldcca.org

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This is a good article about end-of-life treatment from the Harvard Medical School Healthbeat.  They don't charge for things like this they send as an email.  They have many articles that go into much more depth if you are interested.  They charge around $20 or so if you order these.  Go here to see what they have.

http://www.health.harvard.edu

5 commonly held myths about end-of-life issues Some people don't have a health care power of attorney or living will because they don't realize how important these documents are. Others worry that such documents mean they are signing their lives away. Not so. These powerful documents make sure that you get the treatment you would want for yourself if you couldn't communicate your wishes. Here are a few myths that shouldn't get in the way of creating a health care power of attorney or living will: Myth: More care is always better. Truth: Not necessarily. Sometimes more care prolongs the dying process without respect for quality of life or comfort. It's important to know what interventions are truly important. It's often impossible to know that in advance. That's where the advice of a health care team is invaluable. Myth: Refusing life support invalidates your life insurance, because you are committing suicide. Truth: Refusing life support does not mean that you are committing suicide. Instead, the underlying medical problem is considered to be the cause of death. Myth: If medical treatment is started, it cannot be stopped. Truth: Not starting a medical treatment and stopping a treatment are the same in the eyes of the law. So you or your health care agent can approve a treatment for a trial period that you think may be helpful, without any fear that you can't change your mind later. However, be aware that stopping treatment can be more emotionally difficult than not starting it in the first place. Myth: If you refuse life-extending treatments, you're refusing all treatments. Truth: No matter what treatments you refuse, you should still expect to receive any other care you need or want — especially the pain and symptom management sometimes called intensive comfort care. Myth: Stopping or refusing artificial nutrition and hydration causes pain for someone who is dying. Truth: Unlike keeping food or water from a healthy person, for someone who is dying, declining artificial nutrition or intravenous hydration does not cause pain. For more on setting goals for end-of-life care and avoiding common pitfalls, buy Living Wills, a Special Health Report from Harvard Medical School. .................................. I actually had down-time even with all this.  I need to do that because I crash and have to rest.  I took full advantage of that.  This was a good week.  I hope yours went well too.  I will see you next Sunday.      Rachel