Back to Art Class and Finding More Pictures for Ancestry.com

David Rivas from Bear Valley Springs took this beautiful pictures the poppies in the hills above Arvin (a small town by Bakersfield).  Our air quality is so poor here, but the poppies do well despite this.  I find it depressing even seeing it in this picture.  Those up in the mountains have much nicer air.

Picture by David Rivas of Bear Valley Springs
Poppies above the town of Arvin

I had my class with Carol Bradshaw. No one else showed up. I was surprised Wayne wasn't there and texted him. He didn't put it down and had workmen there repairing his roof. He said he would be there next week.  So Carol showed me a project I could work on. She suggested I take a contour drawing I have of an animal and do Zentangle type of designs inside. So I am looking at those I have done.  We worked on drawing rocks. She crumpled a paper and showed how I could see a Rocky Mountain ridge or a rock. She also brought smooth river rocks and coarse ragged rocks suggesting I use sand to bury them slightly using a cookie sheet to hold the sand.  The other thing was her using mats of different sizes and throwing or placing them on the the rocks to create a piece I would draw. 

Take crumpled paper and draw the angles you see
I haven't drawn this yet.

Take a cookie sheet with sides, put sand on it,
then river rocks.  Then draw what you see
I haven't drawn this yet.

This was my second attempt with ragged rocks

This was my third attempt with ragged rocks

What I have to have for next class on Tuesday is just the outline of the rocks.  I'm going to do the river rocks in the sand for that. 

   

Barbara and I went for the last chance to get the 1/8 of one cent sales tax dedicated to our libraries on the June ballot. This was a very harried experience because it was difficult to get a second on the motion to put it on the ballot. Eventually 3 out of 5 board members agreed to it. The problem is that they took a poll and the results were 60% in favor of the tax. This requires a 66 2/3 percent approval and the pollers feel it would not pass easily.  The part I didn't understand is why they only asked Republican women who are likely to vote in this poll.  So the people taking the lead in favor of the library feel they have a lot of work to get it passed, but they are determined. 

I needed to get my car in for service and finally got it done. The big item was new tires. Ugh!  Well at least everything is working.   I found out a couple of things.  Don't let your key fobs be by each other because they will drain each others batteries.  By the way, the same goes for the car.  I used to leave them in the car, since it was in the garage, but the keys and the car battery  drain each other.  I found both these out through experience.

Janet and I met at Mexicali's.  Janet and I are realizing that our relationship is very important to both of us.  So even though our politics are almost polar opposites, we don't want that to get in the way of spending time together. We have both been through a lot and have been support to each other during these times.  It meant a lot.  We have events planned in the near future that we both are anticipating with some involving Barbara. 

I received a notice that my phone can be upgraded. This is every two years. I was worried with some problems I was having. Now all is okay again. 

Here are recent pictures of  two of my great grandchildren. As they grow, their individuality comes out more.  So sweet!  They are so well loved!

Nylah really does have a beautiful smile!

Kason looks tired!

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The following was taken from an article on the role of the chaplain in the Navy. The part I copied is about the factors that influence how a person copes. This is universal and worth noting.  The title was  

Chaplains Help Provide Perspective on the Grieving Process, from navy.mil in response to the attack on civilian sailors in the Washington Navy Yard, September 16, 2013. 12 were people were killed and eight wounded.  

"Grief is always painful, and sometimes it is pretty straightforward and understandable; sometimes it can be complicated and confusing. For example, if one's ninety-year-old grandmother died peacefully in her sleep, a family would naturally grieve her anticipated loss. However when death is sudden or unexpected, traumatic, senseless, and out of sync with life's natural order, grief can be complicated.

There are certain things that can affect how we grieve:

-How close we are, emotionally and geographically, to the person who died.

-Our belief system and view of death can both influence the grieving process.

-What kind of support we experience from our family, our community, our faith group, and others important to us while we are grieving.

-How we cope with other significant life events, including the death of others we are close to.

Chaplains can help support an individual as they begin the process of grieving. They offer perspective and insight to help an individual understand the difference between grief associated with an anticipated loss and grief associated with a sudden, unanticipated loss. 

They can also help validate what an individual is experiencing throughout the grieving process and the time often needed to process one's grief; this includes the fact that there is no set time frame when grieving. Every individual is different".

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I finished reading The Bible. It took me a couple of months. The amount of time I dedicated to it daily varied depending on other activities I had going. I believe it was an interesting thing to do. I have heard

many of the stories, songs and poetry, though I think the sources varied.  It was fascinating to read from front to back. 

The next one to read will be the Tanakh (The Hebrew Bible). 

My friend Mike has done a lot on my family tree. I've also gotten more pictures from my second cousin Simy.  Mike watches Ancestry on PBS and had just seen one on Dustin Hoffman. He felt his situation was very similar to mine.  The short I watched of it, seemed very familiar.  Simy found family who also died in the Holocaust. She also has family who went to live in Israel.   My cousin Steve was contacted soon after moving to California by a man with the last name of Gamarnick, the original family name on my father's side through his father. He worked his way up a company there and has since died. What is interesting, and I can only speak for me, is that I was not interested in exploring this when I was younger. So I wonder if that is a result of approaching death and wanting to understand where I came from, but only recently. I do want to hear the stories now. In the past, I found it boring. 

I found a pictures with my uncle Eli (who was a physicist) and me and another with my Aunt Shirley, my daughter Ronda and me.  This was probably around 1981. They have both since died.  They both were very special to me and I miss them.

My and Uncle Eli

Aunt Shirley, Me and my daughter Ronda

That is it for the week. I hope your week went well and this next week goes well too!                         Rachel

A Needed Slower Week, But I'm Okay

Our Red Hat Dinner was in the Belvedere Room at the Padre Hotel. I enjoy the food here. My daughter Shelley found a pink coat that matches her hat. She looked so nice. They have a couple of chairs in the lobby that remind me of Alice in Wonderland because of the exaggerated lengths of the backs of these chairs. So fun!  We had to get a picture using one.  I had found this most unusual Red Hat at an antique store.  It doesn't show in this picture of Evelyn, but there is a doll on top of the hat.  It has some weight to it and you would have to be careful how you move for the hat not to fall off.  It was perfect for Evelyn as the queen of our group.  She want to pick the right venue to wear it.  She thinks it  would look great, and I agree on a Red Hat cruise. At our dinner, discussed going to another painting class, probably in March- a celebration of spring.  We had so much fun with the last painting class which included wine that we want to keep this up.  I think that I'll also do this with Shelley and her daughter Heather at another art session where she could go since she is not 21 years old yet.

Our Red Hat Group

Evelyn, our Queen, trying on the hat I got her

Pamela, Me and Shelley on the Alice In Wonderland chair,

Janet and I met at Sandrini's, a Basque/Italian fusion restaurant. The have excellent pickled tongue, a specialty at Basque Restaurants.  It just was pleasant talking with Janet.

I went to stay with Kate, my stepmom on Friday and I got back home Sunday around 1:30.   On Friday night, we went to an Italian restaurant we had not been before.  A friend of hers said they had a happy hour with good appetizers to buy.  They did have a good appetizer, but you had to sit in the bar to get the happy hour.  So we sat in the bar.  I liked what I had which was a pasta dish with mushrooms and garlic.  Kate got a pizza, but she thought see ordered a vegetarian pizza, but this had pepperoni sausage on it which isn't her desire.  So she ate very little.  I ate them the next day for lunch.  While there we went to the art store Swain's in Glendale.  We went during a very good sale on paper and other art supplies.  A little later we went to see a movie called 45 Years.  It was a somewhat sad movie about a couple planning a celebration of their 45th wedding anniversary when the husband gets a letter about his first love's body being found in the Swiss Alps.    He had been with her, but because of the snow melting, her body was seen in the ice.  He gets emotional about this and his wife starts to feel that their marriage might have been a sham.  Actually, I thought that might have been the  case.  I wanted to read up on the movie to see if that was what it was. So the audience was filled with older people who age wise could have fit the profile.   Then we went to a Pakistani restaurant for dinner.  Very tasty.  It was too much food.  Next time I won't get a side dish of vegetables, because the main dish had lots of spinach.

On Sunday I picked Kate's brain for her ideas on sketching animals.  She is an artist who has primarily done botanical art.  She pulled out a sketch book showing me how with time her sketches improved.  They did.  She was urging me to keep a sketch book on me to do the same thing.    She recommended I use my cats as subjects.  Kate is a docent at the Los Angeles County Zoo and used the animals there for her sketching.  I also showed her the head of a horse I had done.  She had a few suggestions, but felt it was fairly good.  I will incorporate the suggestions she made in my next drawing.  So this week I did nothing in art, so nothing to show.   I will next week.

Crystal posted a couple of pictures of Nylah, my great granddaughter.

Nylah is really darling!

She is already changing some.

This week I came upon two car accidents before emergency personnel arrived.  One was earlier in the week.  A car was flipped over on it's hood very soon after I got on the freeway.  I think they got out okay because both doors were open.  I could hear the ambulance trying to get in driving on the shoulder of the freeway.  Heading home today, I ran into another one just after getting on the freeway again.  The air bags were deployed.  I have never seen that before.  A younger man was helping an alderman get to the shoulder of the freeway.  I didn't hear any sirens, and parts of the pickup truck were strewn across the road.  I never did hear a siren for that accident.

I feel okay.  I just did a lot less this week.   Down time is needed and I'm taking it.   I hope your week went well and I will see you next Sunday.                 Rachel

Start of Treatment, Benefits of Kaiser Permanente, friends

I had the MUGA scan.  All went well and I started the Herceptin on Thursday. No side effects that I noted. I brought my Kindle and my iPhone which kept me in touch with everyone and read some. I was very tired due to reading too late. So that was all I was noting. I'm so happy they were willing to adjust the next date of treatment so I could attend a class on drawing trees. I can't say how much drawing has become therapeutic in coping with stress.

There were a couple of important events this week.  The Vagina Monologues was done at The Spotlight Theatre as a fundraiser for the Alliance Against Family Violence and Sexual Assault.  It was well done and brought women's sexual issues out in the open.  The documentary The Red Tent: Things We Don't Talk About was shown at The Art and Spirituality Center which was about the start of Red Tent groups to support women.  Very enlightening.

 I have to say I am pleased with my medical care.  I have Kaiser Permanente and I feel they take issues seriously and are responsive to my needs.  I have had people suggest that I change coverage, but that doesn't appeal to me at all.   I like the system.  Generally things move quite fast if you have an appointment or it is an emergency.  Otherwise you may have to wait.  I also like that I can order my meds on line or the phone and most of them are mailed to me.

I have been paying almost $700 a month for my insurance, but I have few other outlays to pay toward my medical needs.  I applied for permanent state disability and it was just approved this last week.  My outlay should drop.  I'm 64, not quite Medicare eligible.  It is that in-between state.  I think it will be better even when I'm Medicare eligible, because there are more out of pocket expenses if you don't have a program from an employer.

 I know there will come a time that nothing more can be done, but as long as I feel well most of the time, I would like to be here.  I have family members who have said "no more" (such as my husband, father and mother), so I know there will definitely be a subjective decision based on how I feel that it is enough.  I seem to be doing okay with this thought.  I think that talking, writing and thinking about it helps to put it all in perspective.  What is fascinating to me is that my cancer does not cause me pain.  The pain I have related to it can be chemotherapy and surgeries.  The Herceptin is not a problem, no pain.  If treatment was short term, I might go for the big guns, but it's not.  This will be every three weeks until the cancer returns or until I die.

I do have pain, but it is not related to the cancer.  A year ago January I fell taking the trash can out to the curb.  I have a compression fracture at L2, the lumbar area.  There are times I'm pain free, but the more I do, or if I really push myself, I have pain.  I have tools that help.  I have a Backjoy Relief that I purchased at Bed Bath and Beyond.  This gets your skeleton in the right position when sitting.  That makes an amazing difference and I can sit a lot longer when I use it.  I also bought a lumbar support at a drugstore.  It has laces that you pull to give you more support.  When I first was injured, I was given a very big contraption to use.  It helped, but it was so limiting.  I'll hold on to it in case I need it later.  And, I take pain medications.  I can't seem to get away from it, though I have reduced it dramatically.  It does not affect my thinking or functioning, so I will continue to use them.  At such time that this does not work adequately, I will get a consult from Palliative Care to see if other medications would work better.

So how to I keep busy?  I pace myself.  I have two art classes.  Each is a different style in drawing.  I love them both.  One will end in a couple of weeks.  I am hoping she will be teaching drawing at a later time.



  I go to Art for Healing events.  I meet with friends and family for meals.  My growing up saw that meal times were when we talked, so they are still very special to me.  I belong to a Red Hat Group that meets monthly.  We go out to dinner at various restaurants in town.  At the last meeting one woman said "you're the healthiest sick person I've ever met."  Ha!  I agree.  I'll keep pushing forward.  I am an amateur photographer and enjoy working with Photoshop Elements 12.  Especially for shots from my trips.  I travel with friends and family.  My last trip was with my Stepmother to Japan.  Great trip.  I read a lot.  I don't go anywhere without a book.  I can tolerate long lines as long as I can read.  I'm so fortunate to have wonderful friends.

Marykay has been in my life for 35 years.  Both of us have been through a lot, but we come up fighting.  She took me in when I moved to Bakersfield and helped me find my own place.  We worked as social workers together in a hospital early in our career and have maintained our friendship even when it might only be two times a year.  She is a wonderful artist and was an inspiration to me as I considered what I would do when I retired.  You saw Michael's picture in last week's blog.  They are an amazing couple who give a lot to others.  I asked Mike if he would speak at my funeral based on something I read about physicists.  He read it and agreed.  It means a lot to me.  Her blogs are attached here if you would be interested in what she does.  I particularly enjoy the grapevine theme, but she has so many subjects she is very good.

Rachel Jerdin and Marykay Feit





Pictures done for class with Nina Landgraff

See you next Sunday at 9 pm PDT

Looking at Treatment

I had a wonderful visit with my friends and even visited with a sister.  Marykay, Mike and I talked a lot about what was going on for each of us and how others perceive how we are doing.  Those subjects will be integrated into this blog.

California finally had some rain, but it wasn't enough to change the outlook for needing to take probably drastic conservation steps.  I went in and out of rain coming home.  Summer will be the test here.

The day after I returned, I met with my oncologist who gave three options in treatment, one, do nothing; two, have surgery to remove the tumor when it is possible (depends on the organ and how extensive it is); and three, take Herceptin every three weeks for the HER2 positive part of my cancer and change the estrogen blocker from Faslodex, an injection to Femara, a pill I would take daily.  In the third option, it is for life or at least until the cancer shows up again.  I chose the third option.  Herceptin had no side effects that I could feel.  And, the Faslodex injections were painful.  Radiation is not an option because I had my lifetime limit.  He had preferred that I have radiation if it was possible.  I would not have minded if that had happened, because the only side effect I had was itching where the radiation was directed. That was uncomfortable, but livable.  It depends on where the radiation goes if you have more negative side effects.  The chemos I've had  I really resist are Adriamyacin, Cytoxin and Taxol.  If it was short term, maybe I would consider them, but it doesn't seem like living when you feel really bad all the time.  Have you gone through any of these and what sort of experience did you have?  Would you decide not to do something because you were so sick with it? 

I'm having a MUGA scan tomorrow to make sure my heart is doing okay to take Herceptin.  I will start the Herceptin on Thursday.  My oncologist is actually waiting for the results of a test being done on the biopsy to make sure that it is a go, but he feels it will be.

This is Mike and me while I was visiting him and Marykay this last week.  I can't seem to locate Marykay's picture but will post it when I figure this out.

My art classes and then practicing really keeps me grounded.  Perhaps next week I'll show a couple of pictures.

All is well here.  Hope you are doing the same.  Rachel

Post surgery, contact with family and friends; random thoughts.

A question asked was why I chose social work when I left music. My father was a social worker. I loved hearing his stories visiting families and working with gangs. Later he worked in training for the Department of Public Social Services. I think he always liked his work.  But I think he was very tired of the politics of it all and decided to retire early. Though I've had health issues when I retired, I also had a hard time with the politics of it. I think most workers would feel this way if it was constantly in their face.

Another question  about this most recent surgery was what was I thinking about before going under anesthesia. Well, I wanted to check out the surgery suite. They asked me to slide over onto the surgery table. What struck me was how narrow the table was and I wondered if someone was really, really big, what did they do?  They said the table works for people up to 1000 pounds. Then they had a discussion that they had a couple of tables that didn't go that high.  I asked the nurse anesthetist if I wouldn't knock out and she assured me that this was not going to happen.  She was right because next I remember talking to my friend Janet who was with me. I do remember that the cancer surgery I had 3 years previously that I was going to stay alert in surgery as long as I could. I checked out all corners of the room. The surgery suite was small, it had a lot of equipment, I think a counter and lots of surgery tools.  The room was white and the lights were very bright. It was also quite cold. They covered me with heated blankets which felt wonderful. Though I think I stayed awake longer,  I remembered being in recovery as my next thought. In other words, I didn't stay awake.  Part of this question really had to do with sharing my deepest feelings going through me at the time.  I would, but that isn't when I had them.  I was just focused on getting through it.

I know some people feel this is a negative way of dealing with this.  I don't think so.  I have been told, "Oh, you are going to be okay".  The problem has been that in fact, each time there was more going on and it was getting worse.  So my preference is not to get excited about good news so I don't have to feel devastated if  the news is bad.  It is another of my coping mechanisms and it works for me.  Those fears about dying was the first time in 2000 and I hadn't a clue as to what was going to happen. The other time, 2007,  I was filled with fear is when my husband had just  died and I was told my cancer had metastasized and only comfort measures could be done. I felt so helpless and vulnerable. As I stated in my last blog that until I found a way to take control of my life, I was overwhelmed with most things.  I couldn't stop crying.  One of the psychiatrists I worked with thought I should go to a support group.  I told him that a group is where you give each other mutual support.  At the time, I could not do that because I didn't want to hear about anyone's issues.  I was completely focused on "me".  He then said, " perhaps a group is not the best thing for you".

I do think there is a place for groups and I have known a lot of people who have used them and found them very helpful.  For myself, drawing, photography and gardening have been my time to focus on what is important to me, relax and sort out the direction I wanted to go.  Then, I talk with the people I'm most comfortable with to get their ideas and support.

Since the surgery, it has been a time of contact with friends and family.  Some I haven't heard from in a while.  I found it very helpful.  It made me feel connected.  I am getting the feeling that maybe I push people away and then they aren't sure what to say or do.  I'm glad they are hanging in there with me.  I wish I could be more open, but I think I worry about losing control of my life.  I am visiting wonderful friends Marykay and Michael Feit. He also has been dealing with cancer, though in remission now,  he went through the loss of his first wife while he was in treatment. We have connected because of  our parallels in treatment and loss.  Because of this Marykay, Mike and I have very open discussions about death and dying, things said to us that sound very insensitive.  We both felt that the odd and insensitive statements were not meant to be mean to us, but in their own way to offer support. We would not balk at people saying they were sorry for what we were going through. We felt there really wasn't much people could say to make it better whether it was losing someone or losing our own lives. We definitely did not want to hear that someone was in a better place, because we did not want them to go.  We both did not want to hear it was going to be okay, when it obviously was not going to be.   Mike and I also felt it very strange when people would say "Sorry you are going through that, but it won't happen to me because I watch my diet", or something like that.  Our sense is that people may think they are preventing it from happening to themselves because they aren't in the same boat. Mike's first wife said a person said to her, "oh yea, I heard about that happening with another person and they died in three weeks."  Something like this was also said to me.   Marykay's previous husband committed suicide, so all of us have had interactions with people that were helpful and not helpful.  We did feel that those who were willing to listen when we were wanting to talk helped. Touches and hugs from those we were close to helped. Giving us space when we asked for it helped. Letting us get back to a routine of work helped.  If people could imagine what it might be for them if they were in this spot, they probably would be more sensitive about what they say.

 When I got up this morning,  Mike  showed me the newspaper and there was a column by Kate Scannell who is a physician who went through cancer treatment.   This column's title is Guidelines for talking about cancer. Very good. In addition, she recommended a book "The Etiquette of Illness: What to Say When You Can't Find the Words" (2004), by Susan P. Halpern. Before Dr. Scannell found this book, she intended to write the book, but she found this one sufficient in covering the subject.

 I was surprised how fast I felt well after this surgery.  I take Oxycodone for back pain that I've had for the last year.  Because it pretty much gets rid of the pain, I forget that it is the pain medication that is helping me feel normal.  When the surgeon said he'd give me Oxycodone after surgery I really balked, because I didn't think it would control the pain.  So he gave me a higher dose and warned me about taking much, in particular, about the possibility of overdosing on Tylenol.   Well, I did take too much the first night (no more than the max dose of pills at one time I was allowed to take).  I was so logy the next day that I didn't take any more pills until bedtime and I took my regular dose of one 5 mg pill then.  I won't be so casual about it next time and I will tell the doctor the next time I see him what I did.

I'll be returning home in a couple of days.  This trip has been very healing as it always is.  I'm taking art classes which are good for the soul.  My art could not even be described as first grade level, but with proper instruction, it is amazing how much I have improved.  See you next Sunday.    Rachel

First Blog, an introduction

Why do I want to do a blog?  Well, I'm going through a lot and I think that writing about it will help me.  But, I also think other people would benefit by it.  I have had cancer for 14 years and I have just started the 4th bout of it coming back.  Not only do I think people who are going through this would be interested, but I think people who care about people who are going through this and don't have a clue as to what to say and what to do might get something out of this.

I was a social worker and most of it was in health care.  One area I worked in got me very close and personal was in Hospice care.  This is care that provides comfort measures, the medications, the equipment and the staff to let families and patients know what was going on and that can allow people to die in the comfort of their own home if they desire.  I loved this work.  The staff and our supervisor were fabulous.  I still keep contact with my supervisor who was an RN.  She is very special to me.

I have to say I was overwhelmed with what was going on and I cried a lot for myself.  On the second bout, my husband died of cancer and I was really torn apart.  Do I cry for him or for me?  I felt incredibly selfish.  My breast cancer was estrogen receptor positive.  It was a stage II when first diagnosed and when my husband died, it was a stage IV, metastasized, stage IV.  Ugh!  I was told they would just keep me comfortable.  I would lie down and think "this is it", but then I wouldn't die.  It had moved to my neck and some in my chest wall.  I got radiation and it worked.  It did start moving another direction and when I told the radiologist, he agreed and I had more radiation.

By the second bout of cancer I was working in a prison.  It was fascinating, to see men who could be so big and yet so out of control.  I mainly worked on the psychiatric unit in the hospital.  There was a psychologist then who said I had to find a way to take control of my life.  It was the loss of control that was the biggest problem.  So I started looking.  I noticed there were some articles about diet and cancer and needing something to focus on, I did that.  It lead me to The China Study which I thought was fantastic.  I feel this country needs to make a change in how it sees food or we are going to go downhill even more.  So I focused on that and I do believe I've been around longer partly because of the changes in my diet.  Actually, I think all people should be doing this, the younger the better.

My third time was in 2011.  There was a tumor above where my left breast had been.  It was a lymph node.  When they ran tests on the tumor they found that it was not only estrogen receptor positive but also HER2 positive, another hormone which would allow me to take Herceptin, a drug found to be particularly effective on this type of cancer.  There was a chance that I was going to lick this thing, but not a chance.  It came back.  I had surgery this week and we will talk about any possible treatment on February 27.

I married late in life, because until Paul came along, there was no one I wanted to marry, so I didn't marry until I was 54.  We had been together for years, and I would have wanted to marry, but he panicked at the thought.  Finally he did ask me to marry him and we married in Thailand on one of our trips.  Paul and I traveled a lot.  We went to many countries in Europe, Russia, Thailand, Macau, Rome, Greece, Kenya, South Africa, Australia, Canada, Mexico and Argentina.  There were many other countries, but you can see, we got around and loved every minute of it, even when things weren't the greatest.  We looked upon everything as an adventure and it was.

Paul came into our relationship with five children who are now grown and have their own children.  I'm received differently by each of them.  I can handle that.  My closest relationship is with my oldest step-daughter.  She has really been there and is a wonderful support.  I also adopted my daughter as a single parent when she was 10 and I was 31.  She had a tough life which ended up being tough for me too.  She is now in Illinois and is carrying on in a way that is okay for her.  My daughter's son lives here and I see him some.  I'm sure he would like to spend more time with me, but I can handle only so much.  He is going to become a father, so that will make me a great grandmother perhaps in April.

Before I went into social work, I majored in music.  I loved it, but dropped out at the end of my junior year because of how I saw I was treated.  I played the bass.  There were many jokes about me playing bass that I finally reached a point I could hardly stand it.  Plus I was told I could become an elementary school teacher and perhaps I would get a chance to use my music there.  That had not been my plan.

So what do I do now?  I retired.  I had multiple things going on and it just became too much.  I started an art class locally and my art teacher is Carol Bradshaw who is a wonderful botanical artist and I can't tell you how fortunate I am to have her as a teacher.  I also signed up for a 5 week class at the Levin Institute because the price was right and there is a wonderful program in town called Art for Healing done at Mercy Hospital.  It doesn't matter if you are a particular religion or no religion.  All activities are to help you relax and focus.  They have different groups in art, singing, writing, acting, etc.  If new ideas come up that can be used, they will do it.  Sister Sherry Dolan is the head of this and she is fabulous.  Another thing I do is go to parks and do my art.  It is a wonderful outdoor setting.   I also fixed my back patio to make it my healing space.  I bought a fountain which looked ridiculous with nothing around it so I put some plastic cypress trees, and dried plants that had aromatic  leaves.  In addition I downloaded sounds of nature that would go on for an hour and put it on a Nano iPod just for what I want on the patio with a small speaker hidden in the trees which makes it all seem real transporting me to the place I want to me.  I have one beautiful chime that sounds great.  I can do my art there, read, have coffee or drink my wine.  I have an outdoor table for eating and I finally got a heater to make the space inviting when it is cold.  I love it.

I move a lot slower than when I was working and I'm glad to be doing that. 

I have a friend Sarah Seifert who is a psychologist and blogs about her family.  She has two young daughters.  One has autism and the other has schizophrenia.  I was watching her blog that made me feel I should do one.  She suggested that the first blog be about my surgery and said "Yes!"  But nothing exciting happened, so everything went smoothly with no issues.  I will tell you though that the previous time I was there with my daughter Shelley, a doctor came in after the IV was started and started to talk about my rectum.  We both looked at him blankly and said "wrong patient". 

My plan is to do this weekly on Sunday nights.   Feel free to ask me questions, I'll try to answer.  I also could get emotional sometime, so don't hold me to being a strong woman.  I do swear, but I'll try to control that.  See you next time.     Rachel