My Grandson Kevin's Birthday Party!

My friend Jody sent this to me. It is full of wonderful points on being creative. Any of us would benefit from this. It helps you cope better and calm down about issues going on in your life. 

10 Tips for a Creative Life

My class with Carol Bradshaw was good as always.  Wayne, my fellow classmate was on vacation, but two women have joined us for some of the flower drawing and painting.  We talked about roses, how they are made up to fully understand them.  It was fascinating to me.  So I should have been working on drawing a rose for my next class, but we have a reprieve since Carol will be out of town this Tuesday and we will not see her for another week.  So I have decided to show you a couple of other pictures this week that I have done a while a go.  I'll have the drawing of my rose done next week.

My Cat Pepper - She Really is a Sweety!

Two Parrots on a Branch

My grandsons Devin and Kevin go to Junior High next year. Kevin got a nice reward with a trophy for how he did. I know Devin is just as smart, so maybe he will shine next year.  Both are now 12 years old.  They are growing so fast!

Heather helped me pick out a couple of new pots and plants, and with the pots  and plants that I bought earlier put plants in pots and painted bird houses which are not quite done.  They turned out very nice. My veggies and herbs have gone nuts. Next time I won't put the squash in the same planter. I will get a very big pot with a cage for it to climb.   Below are the two planters I bid on at the last Helping One Woman dinner.   My granddaughter Heather added the paint on the orange pot.  I think she did a great job!

Heather added the extra paint to this pot

Such a cute planter!  We put Cacti in it and it looks great!

Overgrown Planters with veggies and herbs.
I definitely killed the dill!

I got the second shot in my back. He said he believed that the pain would reduce by 50%. He said "don't bend your back or lift heavy things."  I said "For how long?"  He looked at me in surprise and said "For now on.  It hurts your back."  Huh.  It didn't occur to me that this was for ever. 

I saw my oncologist and had chemo the following day. My oncologist said the MUGA scan showed blood pumping at 60%.  He said it was up from three months ago which then it was 56%. He told me he will make this the baseline in deciding how I'm doing. 

When I came home from chemotherapy, I was needing to eat something comforting. As a kid I would have toast with butter, cinnamon and sugar.  So I sprinkled what I thought was cinnamon and it turned out it was ground cayenne pepper.  Ugh!  I didn't want to throw it out, so I loaded it with cinnamon and added a little more sugar. Very strange!  It was spicy hot cinnamon toast. Not my style.  The taste was not off, just hot. I don't think I'll do that again. 

We had a great birthday party for Kevin yesterday.  Shelley rented a blowup waterslide and we had it set up in the back yard.  Five of Kevin's friends were here with lots of our family.  Perfect weather for a waterslide.

Kevin with a friend

The Blowup Waterslide

Brianna and her Cousin

Kevin with his friends

Kevin and his mom Shelley

 

My granddaughter-in-law, Meagan posted two combined pictures of her and my grandson Billy with each of their sons.  Cute!

Conner is Just Learning to Use a Spoon!

Zylar (Meagan is using Kason's Middle Name)

Jeff and Stephanie (My son and daughter-in-law) are coming up to visit today.  They thought Kevin's birthday party was today (though it is his birthday today)  we had the party yesterday.  So we will be barbecuing today, or should I say Jeff and Stephanie are doing this.  Looking forward to it.  They are getting the food and doing the cooking.  I'll have pictures next week of this.

Hope you are doing well.   See you next Sunday.    Rachel

Great Gathering of Friends

This has been some week!  I continue to rest as much as I can and I have much less pain. The problem is, the more I move around, the more my lower back hurts. Oh well. My back is a chronic pain and I do know if I take it easy I do much better. As my physical therapist said, "take a break every 10 to 15 minutes".  That is easy to forget when at that moment I feel okay. 

My class with Carol Bradshaw went well.  She was complementary expressing amazement that I did what I did with one hand.   I was amazed too! Now we are on to drawing a parrot and have two weeks to do the drawing.

My friend Valerie and I went to Fresh Choice Noodle House for lunch (great as usual). Then we went to Home Depot to get a new faucet for my kitchen and after-market remote controls for three of my fans. She said she would attempt to do  the work this weekend if nothing came up. 

My friend Janet took me to see Dr. Wong for a scheduled appointment.  I had the pin removed. It was becoming uncomfortable which Dr. Wong said was good because the pin was moving and ready to come out.  He removed some of the dead skin, took an xray which showed calcification which is a good thing.  It was recast with a little more of my fingers showing which allows me to manipulate things better. He gave me a prescription for the pain pills.  Janet and I went to Mexicali's for their margarita and dinner.  Below are the pictures of my arm and wrist. 

So I didn't make an arrangement for someone to get my medications because I thought I would go get them. On Thursday, I stalled for two hours and then forced myself to go. It was okay, much better than I thought it would be. I don't think I'm ready to drive out of town.  But, it was a major step.

My granddaughter Kayla and her friend Mariah came by to visit after visiting a friend close by and to get o it of the heat.  Kayla is bored and wants to go on a trip. I told her I was out of commission this year. She said "how about camping?", I said "that too".  Maybe next year and I hope we can go to Martha's home.

Meaghan posted three wedding pictures done by the wedding photographer and the most recent picture of Conner. Very nice pictures. Meaghan and her mother adopted the four little children from a family member. They range from two to five. The middle ones are twins. Meaghan has had a lot of experience with little ones.

This weekend was great meeting with friends I used to work with. There were ten of us and I do believe it was a nice break for all of us. Since we still had time,  Annemarie and I headed to Main Street to go to this gourmet kitchen store. It is now closed on Sundays as are most of the other stores. We usually shop when we go, but no shopping this trip.  My friend Annemarie continues to fix up her little home. She has a good eye. This has turned out to be very cute.  Our group is looking to get together in November. I look forward to that.


While I was gone my friend Valerie got in one remote control on one of my fans. She needs to check on some things before finishing replacement of the faucet in the kitchen. So that is coming along.

My friend Janet picked me up at the train station. We went for our margaritas and and snack. That was a wonderful homecoming.

That's it for the week.  See you next week!          Rachel

Having a Life

Since treatment is once every three weeks, I'm on break from it. There were no side effects having Herceptin.

                                     
                                       I still get questions about my vacation with my step mom

 

Kate to Japan in November.  I tried to set myself up to deal with my back pain to avoid pain. I bought a cane that can be a seat,  I took my Backjoy Relief, wore my back brace and had my pain medication. These will help IF you use them. A part of me was in denial that I needed help. When I went without these aids, I paid for it with limiting pain. I just had to stop. When I used them, I could go a lot longer and  do much more than without them.

I was struck by a few things different than Americans. They appear to be more oriented to the group than the individual.  Though this was different, there was much more cooperation than we might have here.
Kate and I were taking a public bus to go to a museum.  Kate said to get off at the exit we were stopped at.

The bus was jammed with people. We got on at the back of the bus and there was no way to walk to the front to pay. People were pushing against me to keep me from getting off. Finally they let me go. I got off and went to the front door to pay. I believe they thought I had no plans on paying. They have very little crime. They have police booths every couple of blocks in the city. They end up being very helpful in answering questions.   People were very generous in helping where they could.  When we went to breakfast in the hotels, they had lots of veggies in the morning. That is the opposite of how I eat. Not that there  were no veggies at lunch and dinner, but much less.   I loved their ceramics,  artwork and paper making. Though they have constructed homes similar to ours, they have homes using rice paper as walks and in some more remorse areas, there are roofs made with packed reeds.   They are minimalists when it comes to furnishings. In their homes. They looked like they were moving out or moving in. I think they would find my home overwhelming.

Their parks and gardens are really beautiful. Very artistic in how they used water and rocks as a part of  the view. Their toilets are so beyond what we have. They have controls on the side to heat, clean (like a bidet), some have blow drying, odor control and flushing water sound effects with volume control to cover bathroom sounds. In public bathrooms, the heated seats and sound effects were typical.   When it was very cold, those war seats were very appreciated.  When I got home I looked up what it would cost here. They ran from $5000 to $6000 not including installation which would require electricity to it.

Saw The Sixth Floor Trio through the Bakersfield Concert Series with a friend.  When they came out, they looked so young, but their performance was top notch. They played piano, clarinet and bassoon. The bassoon player also played the violin.  The style varied and had a lot of improvising.  They seemed to tie in "the peoples" music into sophisticated pieces. I highly recommend them. A real treat!  It seems to me most of the audience is older and I wonder if younger people will attend these. Now they will be older some day and perhaps it will appeal to them. They are great concerts a reasonable price, especially if you buy for the whole season.

I am back to attending more sessions at Art for Healing at Mercy Hospital. I went to one session where we made faces out of clay that will eventually be used on a wall. It will look great.  My face is the one on the left. Another session I attended was on drawing trees. Lead by Norma Peal. After some brief instruction we were led outside to draw a very old oak tree. I was completely overwhelmed and then decided what the heck. This is my drawing using charcoal and pastels below.  All our trees looked so different. Many people in this class are dealing with some issue. The process of doing art seems to help in letting go and reduce our stress levels.   I'm also going to the open studio offered two times a week where I work on my art assignments from  Nina Landgraff from The Levan Institute at Bakersfield College and with Carol Bradshaw at The Bakersfield Art Association. Nina's class ends next week (darn!). I will look for what she may offer in the fall. Carol has been out on medical for a few weeks. She'll be back mid-April. I need her push and support. She's a great teacher. What is very interesting is hearing how different people may present the same topic. There is a plus to hearing different views.  I love it all.

I went to Hart Park yesterday with my granddaughter Kayla Kline.  I'm working on a portrait of my friend Barbara Long's dog Patti.  I'm almost there.

Next week I want to share a connection of an article written by Noah Michelson "5 Things I Learned from Helping My Dad Die".  It is important because life is important and the death of someone close to us has a big impact on us.  Having lost my parents and my husband which I knew would happen really brings this out.  Of course other losses and are accidents, suicides and murders also have their effect.    I would like to talk about this.

Looking at Treatment

I had a wonderful visit with my friends and even visited with a sister.  Marykay, Mike and I talked a lot about what was going on for each of us and how others perceive how we are doing.  Those subjects will be integrated into this blog.

California finally had some rain, but it wasn't enough to change the outlook for needing to take probably drastic conservation steps.  I went in and out of rain coming home.  Summer will be the test here.

The day after I returned, I met with my oncologist who gave three options in treatment, one, do nothing; two, have surgery to remove the tumor when it is possible (depends on the organ and how extensive it is); and three, take Herceptin every three weeks for the HER2 positive part of my cancer and change the estrogen blocker from Faslodex, an injection to Femara, a pill I would take daily.  In the third option, it is for life or at least until the cancer shows up again.  I chose the third option.  Herceptin had no side effects that I could feel.  And, the Faslodex injections were painful.  Radiation is not an option because I had my lifetime limit.  He had preferred that I have radiation if it was possible.  I would not have minded if that had happened, because the only side effect I had was itching where the radiation was directed. That was uncomfortable, but livable.  It depends on where the radiation goes if you have more negative side effects.  The chemos I've had  I really resist are Adriamyacin, Cytoxin and Taxol.  If it was short term, maybe I would consider them, but it doesn't seem like living when you feel really bad all the time.  Have you gone through any of these and what sort of experience did you have?  Would you decide not to do something because you were so sick with it? 

I'm having a MUGA scan tomorrow to make sure my heart is doing okay to take Herceptin.  I will start the Herceptin on Thursday.  My oncologist is actually waiting for the results of a test being done on the biopsy to make sure that it is a go, but he feels it will be.

This is Mike and me while I was visiting him and Marykay this last week.  I can't seem to locate Marykay's picture but will post it when I figure this out.

My art classes and then practicing really keeps me grounded.  Perhaps next week I'll show a couple of pictures.

All is well here.  Hope you are doing the same.  Rachel

First Blog, an introduction

Why do I want to do a blog?  Well, I'm going through a lot and I think that writing about it will help me.  But, I also think other people would benefit by it.  I have had cancer for 14 years and I have just started the 4th bout of it coming back.  Not only do I think people who are going through this would be interested, but I think people who care about people who are going through this and don't have a clue as to what to say and what to do might get something out of this.

I was a social worker and most of it was in health care.  One area I worked in got me very close and personal was in Hospice care.  This is care that provides comfort measures, the medications, the equipment and the staff to let families and patients know what was going on and that can allow people to die in the comfort of their own home if they desire.  I loved this work.  The staff and our supervisor were fabulous.  I still keep contact with my supervisor who was an RN.  She is very special to me.

I have to say I was overwhelmed with what was going on and I cried a lot for myself.  On the second bout, my husband died of cancer and I was really torn apart.  Do I cry for him or for me?  I felt incredibly selfish.  My breast cancer was estrogen receptor positive.  It was a stage II when first diagnosed and when my husband died, it was a stage IV, metastasized, stage IV.  Ugh!  I was told they would just keep me comfortable.  I would lie down and think "this is it", but then I wouldn't die.  It had moved to my neck and some in my chest wall.  I got radiation and it worked.  It did start moving another direction and when I told the radiologist, he agreed and I had more radiation.

By the second bout of cancer I was working in a prison.  It was fascinating, to see men who could be so big and yet so out of control.  I mainly worked on the psychiatric unit in the hospital.  There was a psychologist then who said I had to find a way to take control of my life.  It was the loss of control that was the biggest problem.  So I started looking.  I noticed there were some articles about diet and cancer and needing something to focus on, I did that.  It lead me to The China Study which I thought was fantastic.  I feel this country needs to make a change in how it sees food or we are going to go downhill even more.  So I focused on that and I do believe I've been around longer partly because of the changes in my diet.  Actually, I think all people should be doing this, the younger the better.

My third time was in 2011.  There was a tumor above where my left breast had been.  It was a lymph node.  When they ran tests on the tumor they found that it was not only estrogen receptor positive but also HER2 positive, another hormone which would allow me to take Herceptin, a drug found to be particularly effective on this type of cancer.  There was a chance that I was going to lick this thing, but not a chance.  It came back.  I had surgery this week and we will talk about any possible treatment on February 27.

I married late in life, because until Paul came along, there was no one I wanted to marry, so I didn't marry until I was 54.  We had been together for years, and I would have wanted to marry, but he panicked at the thought.  Finally he did ask me to marry him and we married in Thailand on one of our trips.  Paul and I traveled a lot.  We went to many countries in Europe, Russia, Thailand, Macau, Rome, Greece, Kenya, South Africa, Australia, Canada, Mexico and Argentina.  There were many other countries, but you can see, we got around and loved every minute of it, even when things weren't the greatest.  We looked upon everything as an adventure and it was.

Paul came into our relationship with five children who are now grown and have their own children.  I'm received differently by each of them.  I can handle that.  My closest relationship is with my oldest step-daughter.  She has really been there and is a wonderful support.  I also adopted my daughter as a single parent when she was 10 and I was 31.  She had a tough life which ended up being tough for me too.  She is now in Illinois and is carrying on in a way that is okay for her.  My daughter's son lives here and I see him some.  I'm sure he would like to spend more time with me, but I can handle only so much.  He is going to become a father, so that will make me a great grandmother perhaps in April.

Before I went into social work, I majored in music.  I loved it, but dropped out at the end of my junior year because of how I saw I was treated.  I played the bass.  There were many jokes about me playing bass that I finally reached a point I could hardly stand it.  Plus I was told I could become an elementary school teacher and perhaps I would get a chance to use my music there.  That had not been my plan.

So what do I do now?  I retired.  I had multiple things going on and it just became too much.  I started an art class locally and my art teacher is Carol Bradshaw who is a wonderful botanical artist and I can't tell you how fortunate I am to have her as a teacher.  I also signed up for a 5 week class at the Levin Institute because the price was right and there is a wonderful program in town called Art for Healing done at Mercy Hospital.  It doesn't matter if you are a particular religion or no religion.  All activities are to help you relax and focus.  They have different groups in art, singing, writing, acting, etc.  If new ideas come up that can be used, they will do it.  Sister Sherry Dolan is the head of this and she is fabulous.  Another thing I do is go to parks and do my art.  It is a wonderful outdoor setting.   I also fixed my back patio to make it my healing space.  I bought a fountain which looked ridiculous with nothing around it so I put some plastic cypress trees, and dried plants that had aromatic  leaves.  In addition I downloaded sounds of nature that would go on for an hour and put it on a Nano iPod just for what I want on the patio with a small speaker hidden in the trees which makes it all seem real transporting me to the place I want to me.  I have one beautiful chime that sounds great.  I can do my art there, read, have coffee or drink my wine.  I have an outdoor table for eating and I finally got a heater to make the space inviting when it is cold.  I love it.

I move a lot slower than when I was working and I'm glad to be doing that. 

I have a friend Sarah Seifert who is a psychologist and blogs about her family.  She has two young daughters.  One has autism and the other has schizophrenia.  I was watching her blog that made me feel I should do one.  She suggested that the first blog be about my surgery and said "Yes!"  But nothing exciting happened, so everything went smoothly with no issues.  I will tell you though that the previous time I was there with my daughter Shelley, a doctor came in after the IV was started and started to talk about my rectum.  We both looked at him blankly and said "wrong patient". 

My plan is to do this weekly on Sunday nights.   Feel free to ask me questions, I'll try to answer.  I also could get emotional sometime, so don't hold me to being a strong woman.  I do swear, but I'll try to control that.  See you next time.     Rachel